My Best Friend's Girl

Baldwin might be in a class all his own here. Nobody does filthy CEO's like him: from Jack Donaghy to Stan Indursky. So many quotable references.

Even here, in this shit Dane Cook disaster, Alec Baldwin turns a 30 second scene into immortality.
If you happen to be even remotely cool enough to be with another guy and a girl you bedded previously walks in, hoist the cigar hand in the air and begin "Last night I fucked that girl within an inch of her life. TRUE STORY".

Let's say she's a freakshow in bed like little miss teaching assistant. She asks you to do something that perhaps you don't know how to do or even what it is. You recount in your telling of the tale that you played innocent: "She screams give me a (unknown thing), I play the choir boy, 'what's that?'"

Let's marvel at this one: "She's bucking like an epileptic at a strobe light convention".

Now I'm getting scared. This clip is so powerful, it's like discovering Plutonium BY ACCIDENT!

"As I'm working out the 9-1-1 call in my head," is a great antecedent to the end of a horrifically hilarious tale, embellished or otherwise.

If you haven't seen this movie, don't. But if you haven't seen this clip, you're welcome. Now if you'll excuse Alec, he needs a moment...

The Edge

Here we have Alec Baldwin in the tweener stage between his handsome bubble and his larger than life comedic rise to heightened stardom. Winter clothing and flannel do well to hid his growing girth, but the jowls never lie. Which is perhaps why he is so well suited to add depth to this silly bear movie with Sir Anthony Hopkins and the black guy from lost. Scroll on over to 2:15 to see some real subtle hilarity from this emerging mountain of a superstar.

If you're ever lost, don't panic. Keep your composure. But if you must question your leader's direction, wave wildly with a stick and a finger and say emphatically:

This doesnt FEEL south (or whatever direction you're trying to go), Charles.

And by God call the people around you by their full names. Charles could easily be shortened to Charlie or Chuck, but Baldwin here decides to jab at his wealthy, prestigious armor by not succumbing to familiarity. He knows he's of a lower class than Hopkins, yet Baldwin is banging the rich guy's wife and mocking his name to his face - all the while he uses Hopkins to get out alive.

But do you know what people die of in the wild? They die of shame...